New

Submission Guidelines


FunnyinFiveHundred.com strives to be the funniest, silliest literary website out there. If you can write a funny flash fiction story, monologue, or novelette, you've come to the right place.

All work must be original, and unpublished. We don't have the time for copyright permissions, so please do not quote copyrighted material (like songs written after 1920). No attacking public figures, groups of people, no fan fiction, or anything that we think would get this website in too much trouble. Edgy work is great, within reason.

Why submit? Because it's fun! And it's an easy way to get some publicity for whatever you're working on. Every article that's approved gets mentioned on our social media and email list (which is growing!). We're also paying for novelettes.

What's the process?  Submit your work below, and will be notified of acceptance or denial. We typically reply within two weeks, but no more than three. For novelettes, please give us a month.

Compensation? We pay for novelettes (see below), but not flash fiction or monologues. One day, we hope to pay for everything. For now, we will gladly provide a link to your blog, website, or book (please provide below).

What are we looking for? 

Flash fiction: We're looking for a story (beginning-middle-end) that brings that laughs and is under 500 words. What makes more sense for this website is to begin with a humorous plot, and run with it for a few hundred words. Although we love plot driven humor, literary-style of writing is great if it provides the laughs. For our sake, remember it's at most 500 words (give or take). Because we only publish (at most) twice a week, we frown upon stories less than 250 words. Our readers are hungry, so let's feed them!

Monologue: We are accepting humorous monologues. These are not beginning-middle-end stories. Rather, pick a topic, and give us some funny observations. Ideally, these should be 250 to 500 words, and should be humorous throughout. Once accepted, we'll post to the website, and we'll make a fun, short video out of them. Click here for an example.

NEW! Novelette: We are now accepting longer stories of 7,500 to 15,000 words. Similar to our flash fiction section, these should be humorous, beginning-middle-end stories. Unlike our flash fiction section, we will pay $.01 per word. Our vision for these novelettes is to fill our bookstore with fun, quick, humor-packed stories that are easy reads and are in a specific genre. This is a new venture, so please allow us a month to provide a decision on your work. In addition, do not attempt to paste your manuscript into the Story / Monologue box; rather, please upload a Word document (not PDF) file. Brownie points will go to stories that are well formatted (double-spaced, 12-point font, title, author bio with any books/links that you would like mentioned, and indented paragraphs).

Author Rights for Flash Fiction and Monologues

We ask for the following rights:
  • First electronic rights, including HTML, PDF, plain text, audio, and video formats. 
  • Distribution will be through this Web site and a variety of other electronic means, including Amazon for our yearly "best of" book.
  • Non-exclusive, one-time right to publish the stories in our yearly "best of" ebook. 
  • Subsidiary rights. We may or may not make videos or a podcast using these stories.
  • After publication, your story will remain in our searchable archives unless you ask us to remove it. 
Author Rights for Novelettes: Once a work is approved, we will send a contract for the rights of the story.

If you have any issues, make sure to email me at david@funnyinfivehundred.com!

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