Funny stories in under 500 words.


“I did quit smoking,” Ashley responded, between puffs, “just like I did ten times before.”

“Fine,” said Kayley, “when you die, I’ll get your clothes and when I wear them I’ll think of you.”

Ashley replied with her middle finger, “Think of this, too, when you wear them.”

Kayley placed the cardboard box on the kitchen table.

Ashley pointed at the box, “Attic?” she asked her twenty-year-old sister.

“Yes, in the corner, next to a banjo with no strings. There must be a thousand photographs in here.”

“Any of us?” asked Ashley.

“Noooo, these go way back.”

Kayley pulled out a creased photograph and handed it to her sister.”

“This is from their wedding, Gramma and Grandpa, they look so young, they almost look fashionable.”


Ashley crushed out the cigarette and joined her twin in sorting through the box.

“I’ve never seen any of these,” Ashley promised, “they must have been up there for twenty years or more.”

“This one’s been Photoshopped ,” said Kayley, as she handed the image to her sister, “Grandpa is standing next to Abraham Lincoln.”

“They didn’t have Photoshop back then,” Ashley replied, “they must have used some form of trick photography. It is a good job, though.”

“And this a fake,” said Kayley as he placed another photograph in her sister’s hand, “Grandpa is posing in front of the Sphinx.”

“This could be real,” said Ashley, “I mean, it’s not impossible that he visited Egypt.”

“Look closely,” Kayley instructed, “the Sphinx still has his nose.”

“Oh yeah, and what is that, that Grandpa is wearing?”

“Who knows?” Kayley replied, “some sort of uniform.” She continue to sort through the box. “Why would any man have so many fake photographs?”

“People had a lot of free time in the old days,” Ashley replied.

“Yeah, you couldn’t feed the hogs all day. I’ll miss him, five more days and he would have made eighty.”

“A lot of people make eighty, now, or older,” said Ashley.

“Yeah, but after Gramma died, I knew he wouldn’t last long.” Kayley pulled a large, photograph from the box. “Here is one of Grandpa at the last supper, with a beard,” she enthused.

“He looks good with a beard,” said Ashley.

“Yeah. I never realized Jesus was so thin.”

“People ate a lot less back then,” promised Ashley. “What do we do with all these photos?”

“I don’t know…I’ll make a scrap book or something.”

This story was written by Edward Palumbo. He is a graduate of the University of Rhode Island (1982). His fiction, poems, shorts, and journalism have appeared in numerous periodicals, journals, e-journals and anthologies including Rough Places Plain, Flush Fiction, Tertulia Magazine, Epiphany, The Poet’s Page, Reader’s Digest, Baseball Bard and Dark Matter. Ed’s literary credo is: if you fall off the horse, get right back on the bicycle.

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